So I got most of the way through a post tonight and realized that I'm trying too hard. I want this blog to be perfect. I want this blog to be a reflection of me and my personal change. Those motivations are so wrong. So selfish.
Those motivations are for personal glory and not for the glory of God.
1 Corinthians 10:31 says "So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God." Writing this blog, feeling the pressure of new readers, I find myself writing for the glory of me. So that my new readers will see what a great Christian I am - how changed and different I've become. That is so sinful. So wrong. I am nothing without God. I can't even image where I would be right now if it weren't for God's forgiveness, grace, mercy, love, wrath and intervention in my life. He is such an awesome God!
Even as I (keyword) was sitting here studying and reading and trying to write a masterpiece of a blog, I see His subtle messages and direction in what I'm reading. I see Him shaking His head at the irony that I'd think this blog is mine and that I can write something helpful and insightful. This blog isn't mine. This is God's blog. I am just the hands that type the message & I'm honored to be even that.
I think it's time to call it a night and I'll have to post tomorrow....
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