When You Just Can't Shake the Emptiness

Feeling alone is really common.

You might feel like you're the only one, but you're actually not.

You might feel like there's no one to catch you if you fall, but there is, you just don't know Him well enough.

My heart aches for you if you feel this darkness. It's impossible to shake on your own. You can fill the void with people, or friends, or shopping, or activities, or things, or food, or boys, but you know as good as I do that once you walk back through the doors of your room at night, the feelings are right back with you.

I completely understand. I know what the distractions feel like. They make you feel alive again. They make you feel happy. But the minute they're gone, so is your soul. 

The only way to shake the void is to fill it with something lasting, something that won't disappear.

That thing is Jesus.

Jesus is love, and happiness, and peace. He is all things good. And these are some of His promises to you:

Psalm 147:3 - He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.

Jesus won't leave the hurt in your heart. Whatever got you to this dark place, whatever wrong was done to you, He will heal in His time. The key is patience and trust. God doesn't work on your time, He works on His time, because His ways are perfect. Trust Him. He will heal your hurt.

Romans 8:28 - And we know that all things work together for good for those who love God, for those who are called according to his purpose.

Things may not be ok right this moment, but they will work out. They will work out in God's timing and in God's way and it will be the best possible solution. And it generally turns out better than anything we could have planned or come up with on our own because God's resources are unlimited. He is the Creator of all. Again, trust His plan and his timing.

Jeremiah 29:11-13 - For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with ALL OF YOUR HEART.

Not only does God have a greater plan for your life than you could imagine, but He wants to reveal himself to you if you will seek Him. However, as the last verse state, you must seek Him with your whole heart. Not your Sunday morning heart. Or your Wednesday night heart. Your whole heart. Every week, every day, every moment. Every happy time and every dark time. Seek Him. And once He reveals himself to you, it will be an experience you'll never recover from. It will be a lasting happiness and joy and peace (even in hard times) that you can't get away from. 

If you're looking in all the wrong places for all the things you can't find, look for God. And don't stop looking until you find Him.

I promise you, the journey is worth it. He is worth it.

God first, and why.

If there is anything I want to leave with you in my writings, it's that God deserves and demands us to live a God first life. God should be the absolute center and core of our being.

But before you can desire to live this way, you have to truly understand why. You have to honestly see who and what you are without God before you can fully appreciate and understand and accept and want a life that is sold out and God-centered.

What does the Bible say about people apart from God?

Romans 7:24 - Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?

Romans 3:23 - For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God,

But God made a way:

Romans 6:23 - For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

If I try to live my life without Him:

John 15:5 - I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.

Romans 8:8 - Those who are in the flesh cannot please God.

Know this: without God, you can do NOTHING.

But there's hope...

Philippians 4:13 - I can do ALL THINGS through Him who strengthens me.

So that's pretty basic, right? We are wretched, helpless sinners. God sacrificed His son to save our lives. If we accept that, and accept who we are, and accept His gift of life, we can live forever forgiven in Him. 

But you can do nothing without Him and all things (even what seems impossible) through Him.

Here's the catch: through HIM. Not through you. Not through church. Not through your friends, your family, your pastor, or your dreams. You can do nothing apart from God. Remember that.

Now that we've covered the basics, you should have a better understanding of why we need God. I mean, I shouldn't have to explain to you why you need God, because you know you better than anyone else knows you. Only you know what you do when no one else is around, when you're alone on the internet at night, or when you're out with friends who don't exactly live for God, or when you're on that date. Only you truly know what you're capable of and the deepest, darkest, nastiest parts of your heart and life. Only you.. and God.

And since you know who you are, and you know who you are apart from God, and if you've accepted His gift of life and want to spend forever in Heaven with Him, somewhere deep inside you should be a part of you that wants to please Him and live for Him. Even if it's kind of far down there, kinda quiet, kinda hidden and pushed away right now, you should feel it down there.

My advice to you is to start looking for Jesus. Start praying (talking to Him like He's a friend), start reading your Bible, or even just googling verses for what is applicable to your life right in this moment. No matter how you do it, if you're ACTIVELY looking for Him, He'll show himself to you. And when He does, it will change your life. It will change your outlook and your desires and how you choose to live. It will give you a peace and happiness that won't go away just because your circumstances are less than ideal. It will give you a love for His people and a passion to give them this joy and hope you have.

I promise you, that if you're a Christian, and you're looking for God every day, every moment, you will become so happy and so burdened to reach others than the small stuff won't matter anymore. Even the big stuff will look less worrisome because your priorities and your focus will fall into place. You'll fully understand and believe that nothing else in this life matters except living for God, praising and loving Him, giving Him glory and spreading what He's given you to everyone you possibly can.

Knowing God will change you. Try it.

Matthew 6:33 - But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

Galatians 2:20 - I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

Proverbs 16:3 - Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.

He must increase, but I must decrease. John 3:30

Because why should I stay pure?

Let's talk about sex.

Sex isn't a dirty word. Sex isn't a dirty thing. In fact, sex within marriage is beautiful. However, Our society has twisted the concept of sex and confused our culture.

Before I get started, as I know what a touchy subject this is, I want to say a few things, disclaimers if you will. First of all, many of you who have been sexually active in the past, or are currently sexually active, have already tuned me out, if you're even still reading. Don't. Give me a chance. Listen to what I have to say. This is for you just as much, if not more, than for any other readers.

Second, just because I blog about something, doesn't mean I'm perfect or have been perfect in that area. In fact, what I choose to write about often comes out of life lessons I've learned personally, or just things I'm strongly convicted about. 

Third, nothing I say here is intended to come across as "holier than thou." Actually, it's the exact opposite. I am a forgiven sinner just like you. If you have any questions or want more scripture references or information on anything I've talked about in this post (or other posts), please email me at heidilynne91@gmail.com. I'd love to help in any way that I can.

The first thing I want to start with is a reference to scripture, because I want you to understand where I'm deriving my opinions from. I know that society has painted sex in a different light than what it was intended for by God and that being sexually active before marriage is very common and even encouraged in our culture. I want to change how you see it.

1 Corinthians 6:13-20
13. Food is meant for the stomach and the stomach for food - and God will destroy both one and the other. The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.
14. And God raised the Lord and will also raise us up by his power.
15. Do you not know that your bodies are member of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? Never!
16. Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For as it is written, "The two will become one flesh."
17. But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him.
18. Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.
19. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own,
20. for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

Before I begin to pick apart any of these verses, I want you to ask yourself a question.
"What are my intentions?"
Are you looking for what you're allowed to do? Are you looking for what you can get away with? If the answers are yes to either, then you need to adjust your intentions and your motives before you can fully believe and obey any of God's word.

If you're not committed to seeking to please God in everything you do, then nothing I have to say about sexual purity today is going to help you because that is another issue in itself. 

Verse 13(b) - The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.
This is pretty straightforwardly telling us that our body is meant for the Lord's purposes, and that immorality is not one of His purposes for us. Immorality is defined as: sexual misconduct, wickedness, evil, dishonesty, etc.

So what exactly is sexual misconduct? Let's continue...

Verses 15 & 16 - Do you not know that your bodies are member of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? Never! Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For as it is written, "The two shall become one flesh."
This clearly shows us that our bodies are members (an individual thing belonging to a group) of Christ. Christians are people who belong to Christ. The next few lines discuss that when two people have sex, they become members of each other, or they become one. The ONLY person we should become one with is God first, and our spouse second. If we are becoming one with anyone other than God or our spouse, we are committing sexual misconduct.

This next verse is what really convicted me.
Verse 17 - But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him.
When I read this, I heard as clear as day, "The Lord cannot join with someone who is joined to someone else outside of marriage." Call me crazy, but I believe God still speaks to our hearts if we are open to listen.
This is where your motivation comes in. Are you motivated to see what you can get away with, or are you motivated to be one with the Lord?

Think about that.

Versse 18-20 - Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
These verses are also pretty cut and dry.
Run far away from sexual immorality (sex outside of marriage). Period.
Why would you want to commit a sin against yourself? Why would you intentionally hurt your own body? You were purchased by Jesus' life on the cross, so therefore, it isn't even yours to do as you want. It is His. We are to live in a way that pleases God and God alone.

Which brings me back to the original question: What are your intentions?

Are you wholeheartedly seeking to please God in everything you do?
Are you sold out, willing to give every inch of your heart and soul to Him, including your sexual purity? Are you REALLY a follower? Or are you just a fan?

If a man loves you, and loves God more than you (which is how it should be), he will wait. If he won't wait, then it's not you he wants, but it's sex. Anyone can say "I love you," but the ultimate test is proving it.

The first step to staying pure in your current, or any upcoming relationships is talking about it. Bring out your Bible, have your significant other read these verses. If they react in anger, you'll know that your relationship isn't about love, it's about sex. If they believe God and the word of God as you do, they'll agree. Putting your convictions out in the open and discussing what you read in your devotion time with God is a good way to keep healthy communication in your God first relationship.

God is love. God is forgiveness. Anything you've done, or will do, He can and will forgive. But let me warn you not to be a  r e p e a t   o f f e n d e r .  Don't use the excuse that God will forgive you to purposefully commit the same sins over and over and over again. 

Because if you know what is right in your heart, and you continue to do wrong, are you truly even sorry?


Seek God. Stay pure.