I have spent 25 years analyzing the mountain. Trying to understand it, trying to move it, trying to explain it. I’ve made excuses, I’ve made arguments, and I’ve cried. I’ve cried a lot actually.
But here it is. Still standing. Taller than ever. Scarier than it’s ever been. Looming over everything and everyone I love, threatening to take it all away.
To say I hate this mountain is an understatement. And yet I’m so ashamed to say that I hate it. I’ve tried to give it to God many times. I’ve tried to fix it. I’ve tried to “be better” in hopes that God would see my efforts and just take it away. I’ve tried everything and quite frankly, I’m tired of “trying.”
But no amount of trying to fix it or be better or crying has moved my mountain.
But tonight I unlocked the key to moving the mountain and looking back, it was the most simple thing I have ever done.
I laid in the floor of my room and I cried. And I poured my heart out to God. I told Him all the ways in which this mountain had hurt me. I told Him all the ways that I had tried to fix the mountain, move the mountain, appease the mountain. I told Him everything. And you know what I got back after telling God everything?
He already knew. And He loves me. And He’s holding me.
That’s it.
But that’s all I needed tonight for this 25 year, monster of a mountain to move. That’s it. I needed God to tell me that He loves me and that He’s holding me. Of course I already knew that, but tonight I needed to feel His love and His strength. I needed to sense His presence. That’s it. I did nothing but lay on the floor crying and telling God how I felt. I was raw and honest and broken at His feet and He came down and strengthened me and held me.
And just like that, this mountain, this 25 year old, terrifying mountain was moved in my life.
Now here’s the catch: my situation has not changed one bit.
What has changed for me is my heart. My outlook. My faith. My trust. My focus.
The mountain will need moving again tomorrow. And tomorrow I will lay it at God’s feet again. I will cry again if I need to. I will pour out my heart to Him again tomorrow if I have to. And I don’t doubt for one second that my God will again move my mountain because I know how He loves me.
And I have faith that, in time, God will make something of this mountain. He will change it or use it for His glory in some way. But until then, I will give Him this mountain every day and I will lay my life down at His feet every day and pour my heart out to Him and He will strengthen me and love me and hold me. And God will continue to move my mountain.
What mountains do you need God to move? Have you really laid them at your Savior’s feet? Have you poured your heart out to God and trusted Him to take care of the mountain in your life?
If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer. Matthew 21:22
This verse is often misunderstood. It doesn't mean that whatever we want will be given to us in the way that our little brains believe we should receive. It means that if we truly believe that God has everything in control and that He will take care of us, if we pray in full faith that God will take action on our behalf, then He will take care of us. He will give us what we want, but sometimes it's not always in the way that we want it.
Believe and you shall receive what you ask for in prayer. Believe that God will move your mountain.
Believe it.
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